saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
