Texts From Last Night

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  (503): View more from Oregon

  Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?

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  (503): Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes? http://tfl.nu/o6hc
  Replies (7) Good night (2838) Bad night (444) Order T-Shirt
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters

  (501): View more from Arkansas

  ok you need to stop NOW

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  (479): okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters (501): ok you need to stop NOW http://tfl.nu/gm1r
  Replies (46) Good night (1108) Bad night (4000)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.

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  (813): If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story. http://tfl.nu/womj
  Replies (14) Good night (655) Bad night (2436) Order T-Shirt
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Come over? It's my birthday

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  How many times has that text failed you tonight?

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  (203): Come over? It's my birthday (267): How many times has that text failed you tonight? http://tfl.nu/a6z6
  Replies (19) Good night (803) Bad night (7801)
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?

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  (785): So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor? http://tfl.nu/b721
  Replies (13) Good night (493) Bad night (3739) Order T-Shirt
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  (941): View more from Florida

  I really should sober up and deal with this hangover

  (941): View more from Florida

  It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though

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  (941): I really should sober up and deal with this hangover (941): It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though http://tfl.nu/cygd
  Replies (5) Good night (1977) Bad night (776)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?

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  (502): I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here? http://tfl.nu/c5kh
  Replies (6) Good night (2140) Bad night (686) Order T-Shirt
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  (607): View more from New York

  She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.

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  (607): She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her. http://tfl.nu/f1tk
  Replies (7) Good night (4266) Bad night (771) Order T-Shirt
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar

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  (513): Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar http://tfl.nu/rpu6
  Replies (7) Good night (3600) Bad night (766) Order T-Shirt
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.

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  (401): Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself. http://tfl.nu/agcx
  Replies (3) Good night (2111) Bad night (731) Order T-Shirt
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?

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  (270): Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off? http://tfl.nu/sbu9
  Replies (19) Good night (525) Bad night (3457) Order T-Shirt
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS

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  (416): DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS http://tfl.nu/59kb
  Replies (8) Good night (1975) Bad night (759) Order T-Shirt
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?

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  (312): When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad? http://tfl.nu/0o5n
  Replies (14) Good night (1330) Bad night (785) Order T-Shirt
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.

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  (410): I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex. http://tfl.nu/2gjc
  Replies (7) Good night (1059) Bad night (261)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.

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  (519): We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars. http://tfl.nu/3me1
  Replies (7) Good night (731) Bad night (175)

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