question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
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