we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Randomize
