I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Shitshow foam night was such a success
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
MIDGETS
????
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize