And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
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