I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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