Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?