I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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