dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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