wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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