new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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