Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Is it penis luge time yet?
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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