it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
