Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Randomize
