You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
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His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
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I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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