did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
