But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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