we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
foreskin is a definite game changer
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
