Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Randomize
