Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize