Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
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