This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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