Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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