Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Randomize
