i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
