How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Randomize
