I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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