Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
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Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
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The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Randomize