porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
My liver just had a heart attack.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
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