i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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