Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
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