I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
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