Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Randomize
