We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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