Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize