I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
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