lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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