I want to stick my p in your. b.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
