it was like his penis was on wheels.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Randomize
