She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
