But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
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The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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