I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
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