Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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