Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize