we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
