thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
