I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
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