Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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