Do you still have your period?
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize
