It's like God shit irony all over that family
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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