i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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